The woman was a coworker of mine. I thought she was a friend. I knew she was troubled, that she had a past or rather, a present. She was a single lady, currently using and being used by a few different men in her life. She felt comfortable confiding in me about what was going on and I meant to help her. I knew that at least a portion of her suffering was of her own devices, since she enjoyed the night life, but I tried not to judge her too harshly for this. I thought her appetite was only natural since she wasn't following after the Lord.
I was building a friendship with her when, by chance, she met Dwayne. He'd come to visit me at work and she'd passed us in the hall. A day or so later, she and I were sitting and talking at length, like we did. She began with compliments about what a Godly husband I had and what a great match I had made in him, but somehow, perhaps by force of habit for her, her attitude changed towards me. She was challenging me all of a sudden, woman to woman. She smirked and taunted and asked boldly, directly, "What would you do if I came on to your husband?"
I didn't hesitate to answer her, in fact, the words just poured out. But, before I did, it was like time slowed down for me and I had the chance to look at her, to study her face and register that she was, in fact, being very serious, gravely serious. I had time to be disturbed, had time for my spirit to be rattled to the core because it was as if it wasn't just her speaking, but also some strong demonic force looking out from her eyes, asking me what I would do if someone attempted to break up my home.
I can't remember what it is that I said, exactly, but it may have started with the words "Get thee behind me." I know I looked her straight in the eyes and I quoted at least some of the last portion of Proverbs 6 and a large portion of Chapter 7 from memory, apparently, and with a finger pointed in her face. But, the funny thing is, I don't know Proverbs 6 and 7. I still don't know it. I've never memorized it. So... the words just came to me. At the time, I had no way of explaining what happened when I answered her question. It was against my character to be so forceful then, though I've changed a lot over the years... But, now, I would say that I must have been filled with the Holy Spirit and He must have given me the words I needed to rebuke her.
She didn't come back to work the next day. I wasn't surprised by that. But, after a few days, I asked where she'd been and I was told that she'd quit, given no notice and wouldn't be coming back.
Fast forward several years.
I see this video for the first time and hear the lyrics, "He is jealous for me. Loves like a hurricane, I am a tree bending beneath the weight of his wind and mercy..." And, thinking about them, the storm of emotions from that day hit me again. I made the connection that it is, at times, perfectly God-like to get angry, to be jealous, to insist on singularity, to fight for what is best for someone we love.
For example, I have cut a covenant with my Dwayne. When we married, the promises we made were binding and God cut a covenant with us. I love Dwayne better than any woman and because of that, I want what is best for him. I am confident that I am what is best for him, since I am his wife before God. I have a right to be jealous over him. In fact, it is only right that I am jealous for him and insist on singularity in our love. It wouldn't be loving if I didn't get angry and fight when some she-devil expressed a strong desire to ship wreck my husband's life, our life together, our family, our childrens' home, with her seduction.
And, just like that, God is jealous for us. He's made a covenant with us. He has made promises that He will not break. And, He loves us better than anyone, wants the best for us and knows that it is, in fact, He that is best for us. So, He has a right to be jealous. In fact, it is only right that He is jealous and gets angry when someone tries to ruin our lives or tries to divert us from His will. And, more than anything, because He loves us so much and has committed so much of Himself to us, He can insist on a singularity in our love for Him.
"I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God... You shall have no other Gods before me."
Sunday, January 3, 2010
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